Research Paper Part 1
Friends & Family

Professor Stevens, English 28


Brainstorming: Friends & Family


Do not use technology in this essay, such as cell, Facebook, Twitter, etc.


Noisy house

Load music

Comes over too much



Clean house

Cook for family

Care for yard

Wash windows

Talks loudly

A screamer

Comes into my room

Wants play time

Wants to watch a game

Makes a mess

loud video games

Neighbor makes noise

Go to the store

Take sister to succor

Pick up my sister


Get kids ready for…

Go out to dinner

Plays TV loudly


Take kids out for meal

argue a lot

Get angry

Fight with my . . .

Wash car

Vacuum house

Clean up after dinner

Take sister to friends

Up tight

Doesn’t like me


Quarrel over nothing



Take care of dog

Wants to talk

Needs visit

Go clubbing

Do laundry

Pick up kids mess






Intrudes on my space

A know it all

Watch my brother

Change dipper


Because of the above, your friends and family make you

·         irritated

·         angry

·         stressed

·         upset

·         frustrated

·         annoyed

·         consumed with revenge,

so you cannot function, making it difficult to do your

school work . . .

homework . . .

assignments . . .

focus . . .

 lessons . . .

projects . . .

concentrate . . .

college assignments . . .

move on . . .

start up again . . .

stay on task . . .


Optional: What YOU SHOULD be like

to be a better person:











Loyalty (unconditional)

Easy going




Honest (not hurtful)

Sense of humor







Good listener (not judgmental)




Common interests

Full of it



Good role model

Out going






The above topics need “will” in every sentence. 

These sentences address what you will do in the future. 

You will address what you will do in the future to change your behavior to be less stressed and angry. 

You cannot change others only yourself



Paragraph 1:

What your friends & family that keeps you from being doing well.
List words you will write S, C, CX sentences with:

Optional: Paragraph 2:

What you will do about it.

List words you will write S, C, CX sentences with:


















































Strengthening an Essay with Examples


Red = Topic Sentence
Blue = Example

                As an inexperienced hiker, I often get in trouble because I am more concerned about minor dangers, such as a rare, harmless snake.  I pay less attention to serious dangers like dehydration and exposure to extreme cold.  For example, I once hiked into the Grand Canyon with one granola bar and a very small bottle of water. Therefore, I became severely dehydrated and was too weak to climb back up without help from a passing tourist group, making the return to the top on mules.  I was lucky. 


Topic Sentences: Blue

           Examples: Bold


The Hazards of Going-to-movies

            I am a movie fanatic. My friends count on me to know movie trivia (who was the   pigtailed little girl in E.T.: The Extra-Terrestrial? Drew Barrymore) and to remember every big Oscar awarded since I was in grade school (best picture 1994? Forrest Gump). My friends, though, have stopped asking me if I want to go out to the movies. While I love movies as much as ever, the inconvenience of going out, the temptations of the theater, and the behavior of some patrons are reasons for me to wait and rent the video.

             To begin with, I just don't enjoy the general hassle of the evening.  Since small local movie theaters are a thing of the past, I have to drive for fifteen minutes to get to the nearest multiplex. In Addition, the parking lot is shared with several restaurants and a supermarket, so it's always jammed. I have to drive around at a snail's pace until I spot another driver backing out. Then it's time to stand in an endless line, with the constant threat that tickets for the show I want will sell out. If we do get tickets, the theater will be so crowded that I won't be able to sit with my friends, or we'll have to sit in a front row gaping up at a giant screen. Lastly, I have to shell out a ridiculous amount of money-up to $8-for a ticket. That entitles me to sit while my shoes seal themselves to a sticky floor coated with spilled soda, bubble gum, and crushed Raisinets

            Second, the theater offers tempting snacks that I really don't need. Like most of us, I have to battle an expanding waistline. At home I do pretty well by simply not buying stuff that is bad for me. I can make do with snacks like celery and carrot sticks because there is no ice cream in the freezer. However, going to the theater is like spending my evening in a Seven-Eleven that's been equipped with a movie screen and comfortable seats. As I try to persuade myself to just have a diet Coke, the smell of fresh popcorn dripping with butter soon overcomes me. Chocolate bars the size of small automobiles seem to jump into my hands. I risk pulling out my fillings as I chew enormous mouthfuls of Milk Duds. Consequently, by the time I leave the theater, I feel disgusted with myself.

             Many of the other patrons are even more of a problem than the concession stand. For example, title kids race up and down the aisles, usually in giggling packs. Teenagers try to impress their friends by talking back to the screen, whistling, and making what they consider to be hilarious noises. Adults act as if they were at home in their own living room. They comment loudly on the ages of the stars and reveal plot twists that are supposed to be a secret until the film's end. And people of all ages create distractions. For instance, They crinkle candy wrappers, stick gum on their seats, and drop popcorn tubs or cups of crushed ice and soda on the floor. In addition, they also cough and burp, squirm endlessly in their seats, file out for repeated trips to the rest rooms or concession stands, and elbow me out of the armrest on either side of my seat.

             In conclusion, after arriving home from the movies one night, I decided that I was not going to be a moviegoer anymore. I was tired of the problems involved in getting to the theater, resisting unhealthy snacks, and dealing with the patrons. The next day, I arranged to have premium movie channels installed as part of my cable TV service, and I also got a membership at my local video store. I may now see movies a bit later than other people, but I'll be more relaxed watching box office hits in the comfort of my own living room.

Langdan,  College Writings with Readings